Give up on your goals - The problem with goal setting....

This may seem to some a bit weird, especially when goal setting is heavily promoted in the personal development  world, I believe there is a flaw in goal setting and the law of attraction, In this blog post I'm going to give you the basis of that flaw and why some people don't achieve their goals.


At first this flaw sounds like a contradiction to goal setting, and when I first heard it I thought that too! however when you really think of it, it makes perfect sense! I believe in this so much because it's worked for me when I realised that I needed to let go of my goals. 


So here's the thing, when you let go of your goals and make it alright that you may not get them it just seems that it flows! I realised this when I was doing my NLP master practitioner course, that I wanted a specific goal too much and was basing my future happiness on getting the goal and to me it was like if I didn't get the goal then life would be well...crap. This is what a lot of people do when goal setting, they become desperate for the goal as if their happiness or other feeling/emotion depends on achieving the goal. This is the key ingredient that was left out in the secret...and goal setting systems. When you say to yourself well I really want this and I'm going to work towards achieving it, but you know if I don't get it then that's okay too, this is when goal setting and getting your goals works!


If you've not got this yet, let me give you this analogy, imagine a guy who is desperate to get a girlfriend and he is basing his happiness on this end result, If over time he doesn't get that result or 'goal' he'll become even more desperate and maybe sad or depressed, now they say women can smell desperation and so he doesn't get his goal as he pushes girls away because he's trying to hard. However if he makes it okay not have this goal and is happy anyway he becomes more attractive and therefore gets the girl!


I don't know specifically why it's like this (well in my world it seems to be) maybe it's the universe smelling that desperation is just telling us that we don't need it to get that feeling or emotion, or maybe it's just our unconscious mind.


So if you've not been achieving your goals or achieving them as easily as you'd like, maybe it's time to let go of them and be okay if you don't get them?




To your success
Paul